Monday, January 25, 2010

Kind words, Sweet thoughts, Good Times

Awards make me very happy. Last week I received this one from Elizabeth...
and I've been working on this post ever since, off and on. Sad to say it's taken me a while to come up with ten things that make me happy because of how I define it, i. e. as a general state. A lot of things give me pleasure and enjoyment but either I'm happy or not. And I am in general. But I do feel things deeply. I sometimes feel the feelings of others deeply. I can get lost in their emotions and mistake them for my own. And with the events this past week in Haiti, Massachusetts, the Supreme Court all against a backdrop of cold, constant and gloomy rain, these are some of the things I've been turning to lately in order to stay grounded and, in general, happy:

1. Writing/painting/drawing.
I don't know why I procrastinate some days. Artistic doubt maybe, which does serve a useful purpose. It keeps me from becoming complacent. But if I'm not careful this doubt becomes a runaway train robbing me of creative enjoyment. But whenever I'm working it feels completely right.

2. Connections.
I grew up in a family that thought judgement, shame and blame were the most useful tricks in the toolbox of life. So maybe it's no surprise that I end up with a few friendships that, at times, mirror this old dynamic. And how I react without making things worse has been part of my growing up process.

Never throw anyone away, Audey Hepburn once wrote. Well...sounds nice, but some people I really can do without, their absence a gift that just keeps on giving. The trick is discerning who I should let go off (i.e. happily drop) and who is worth the work. Because we all go through difficult times.

So last week I met with a certain friend, and another I haven't seen in a while, for coffee and dinner. I enjoyed it but I also found myself afraid to touch certain topics, things I would not have hesitated to bring up before. Oh well. Trust must be rebuilt one step at a time. And if we don't become as close as we once were, then at least I can be glad of the fact that I did what Audrey Hepburn would do, I didn't throw her away.

3. Reconnections.
Facebook is awesome. Since signing up I've reconnected with a lot of people I'd lost touch with over the years, grade school friends, people I used to work with and so on. The thing with grade school friends, though, is that it is impossible not to see the ghost of their little former selves superimposed over the adults they've become. Or to not hear their childish voices when they update their status. Strange too, not like I feel free enough to invite them, or myself, over for coffee. Still...in a childhood that was both happy and horrible (thanks to dear old dad), they made up a big chunk of the happy part. I'll always be grateful to them for that.

4. Artistic connections.
Writing and painting can be very isolating activities. And I love being around people. So I've joined as many writing and painting groups as I can. On line, there's Chiustream of course, whenever I want. Some drawing/painting groups that meet once a month. Every other week, there's the writing group that meets in a cute Noe Valley cafe for all day writing marathons. Then, once a week, I meet with a writer friend also for the sole purpose of writing. These groups not only keep me company but they also keep me motivated. Don't wanna sit there staring into space or watching The Office online when everyone else is typing/drawing/painting away.

5. Gifts/free things.
Of course I love Christmas and birthday gifts. But getting gifts during post gift giving season for no reason in particular? Like these side dishes Beecher's Handmade Cheese sent me...
last week for no other reason than having mentioned them in one of my Seattle posts! Wow, the power of the written word. Does this officially make me part of the media? When they contacted me I assumed they'd send me trial size versions, quarter cup servings just enough to make me want more. Not these enough for three meal sized boxes all including their amazing cheddar (am guessing it's cheddar though they simply refer to it as handmade). Christmas in January for an artist on a budget. Wonderful.

6. All the hot chocolate I want and/or a dessert every day.
Right now I have a bag of chocolate pieces in the fridge. And in the freezer, some frozen cookie dough, Toll House and Trader Joe's. And, after too many samplings of both, I have to say T.J.'s all natural chocolate chip cookie dough really is way better. (Think this'll get me some free T.J. cookie dough?). Thank goodness, because if I didn't, I'd have to brave the cold to go on a special dessert finding expedition.

7. Playing.
Shopping, goofing around with my nieces and nephews, running in the rain and splashing through all the puddles, dodgeball. I don't let myself play enough. Sunday I chose working with my writing group over a muddy, freezing game of dodgeball. I was glad to get some work done but afterwards I thought, gosh, I should have played dodgeball! So I made up for my uberseriousness with a few hours of bargain treasure shopping.

8. Live music/dancing/poetry and/or literary readings.
I went to this Rabbie Burns thing at the Edinburgh Castle on Saturday night because it sounded too good to miss (men in kilts, poetry, free food). It wasn't, unfortunately (too much ranting about current events which I was trying not to think about, not enough poetry) and if that's what haggis tastes like (very, very bland, though the haggis ceremony was pretty cool), not sure if I'll try it again. But I'm glad I went anyway.

9. Sleep. And 10. Having worked out
Because having had a good night's sleep or having worked out (in between or despite the rain), especially in the morning when I don't have to spend the rest of the day dreading a work out, ah, that's the best.

Now to pay it forward. The ten blogs I nominate for this award are:

and (I just have to sneak one more in)...

19 comments:

  1. #9 is priceless. Without a good night's sleep, I'm useless the next day.

    ReplyDelete
  2. i love your list! sometimes it is hard to think of things that make us happy, particularly when the weather is crap, life seems unfair, and all is not good. but given a bit of time i can usually come up with SOME things that make me happy. sometimes after i am on a pity trip, i MAKE myself do that!

    well congrats on the award, and thank you so much for passing it on to me. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. A nice list reflecting happiness, but always with some shades (nuances). Makes them sound more real!

    ReplyDelete
  4. #10: working out . . .

    you know, cheryl, up until i read your post, i was going to be a total wanker and skip it today.

    but NO!

    treadmill here i come!

    ps: you're very kind. thank you so much for thinking of me.

    and your art, whether prose, painted, or printed is priceless.

    ReplyDelete
  5. That same runaway train makes it's way through my office way too often. I shed the "old dynamic" of shame and blame passed on to me from my dear old mom years ago, thank God! And it's so cool that you got free product because of your blog. Way to go! Trader Joe's is one of my favorite stores in the whole world. I hope you didn't mind the award thingy, I'm on the verge of announcing that I don't want anymore of these at my place. I find them awfully time consuming, but I don't want to come off as a poor sport so I may not. Love ya, Elizabeth.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Wow, thanks! I feel honored! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Love your list- and I think that you got free stuff- is awesome. Anything that involves cheese is a good thing.

    Congrats on your award!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Great list! Congrats to you and your nominees.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thank you for the award Cheryl.
    I never follow them up, though I love to get them :-)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Congrats on the blog award, Cheryl, and what a fabulous and inspired list. Thank you, too, for nominating my blog. Although I don't participate in the blog awards, it's always a great pleasure to be nominated. Thank you, gorgeous girl. You truly are a star. xx

    ReplyDelete
  11. Congrats on your award and THANKS YOU SOOOO MUCH for the great honor! I'll def be blogging about this greatness soon!
    **note to self: Cheryl is awesome!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thank you! I would especially like to thank all the little people that made this award possible. And yes, by little people I mean midgets.

    Time to start drafting….

    ReplyDelete
  13. ...traigo
    sangre
    de
    la
    tarde
    herida
    en
    la
    mano
    y
    una
    vela
    de
    mi
    corazón
    para
    invitarte
    y
    darte
    este
    alma
    que
    viene
    para
    compartir
    contigo
    tu
    bello
    blog
    con
    un
    ramillete
    de
    oro
    y
    claveles
    dentro...


    desde mis
    HORAS ROTAS
    Y AULA DE PAZ


    TE SIGO TU BLOG




    CON saludos de la luna al
    reflejarse en el mar de la
    poesía...


    AFECTUOSAMENTE
    CHERYL

    DESEANDOOS UNAS FIESTAS ENTRAÑABLES OS DESEO FELIZ AÑO NUEVO 2010 Y ESPERO OS AGRADE EL POST POETIZADO DE LA CONQUISTA DE AMERICA CRISOL Y EL DE CREPUSCULO.

    José
    ramón...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Very cool blog! I will be back for more!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Congratulations, Cheryl, on this award, well deserved!
    Thank you for taking the time to write this very interesting and smart list, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and shall remember certainly more than a few to apply to my own life.
    Hugs,
    Merisi

    ReplyDelete
  16. Yay! Congratulations on your award! #8 and #9 are two of my favorite things too. And you are great at #1.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Numbers 6 & 7 are my favourites.
    And I think happiness is to be found in the moments - we just always have to keep our eyes open for them...

    ReplyDelete
  18. Sorry I am so late to the party! I love your list . And I am delighted to be invited to play too. This is a great exercise. I know one thing that makes me happy, having lovely blogger friends definitely makes me happy. Thank you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Thanks everyone, sorry I didn't respond earlier and individually. Am thinking today I should try to add at to my happy list every day...

    ReplyDelete

ALL ANONYMOUS, JUNK COMMENTS WITH BLOG OR WEB SITE LINKS ARE AUTOMATICALLY DELETED! No one, not even I, ever see them. So, please don't waste your time.

But comments from fellow artists, friends, and anyone genuinely interested in this blog and my work are always welcome though! :-)