Sunday, January 9, 2011

A Happy New Year

(@ the De Young)

I hope so because 2010 just sucked. So much so that after trying to recap all its suckiness the other day in the first draft of this blog post I needed chocolate bad which I tore into before leaving the store. Going back for seconds, I just had to look at the ingredients list. Of course there was soy in it, my favorite chocolate bar, as well as every chocolate bar there. (I have sworn off soy in all its nefarious and increasingly ubiquitous forms because it’s one of the reasons why 2010 sucked so much.) So I settled for a comforting cup of soy free (so far) hot chocolate back home...only to forget the milk. My apartment stunk of microwave burned chocolate for days.

Oh well. I put it down to last year’s lingering suckiness. Health issues (bronchitus, soy, a heart murmer I have to stay on top of, a monster of a cold I just got over), lots of personal drama, heartbreak, way too much family time, near constant financial worries, boring, occasionally 12 hour back to back exhausting, occasionally demoralizing crappy non art work (product promotions), death, et cetera and so on. Basically every area of my life has shifted or changed. 2010 was an intense year emotionally and physically and right now I feel dazed, depleted and a little lost.

Which is why I’ve taken a rest from blogging lately. Either I was too exhausted to write or I just didn’t know what to say. After my last post, my family was adamant I not speak at all. I made the mistake of telling them how I wanted to respond to some of the people who’d known my father, people whose comments were, here and there, on the judgemental side. I’m sorry, I wanted to say, he may have been your friend and all that but he was my father and blah bi-di-blah, not nice things, misplaced anger and resentment.

2011, I think, will be about making choices. Thanks to some parting gifts from my dad, I have the breathing space to figure things out and more freedom to do what I want. I haven’t taken another crappy non art job since mid December. Instead I’ve been sleeping a lot, trying new recipes, window shopping, getting back in touch with friends and, of course, practicing, learning about and looking at lots of art, which feels more like therapy right now. I mean, standing in front of Sargent’s La Carmencita, I forget any fears of ending up like Lily Bart. (Why didn’t she just take the money and run, for god’s sake? Idiot.) An astrologer friend of mine (her link here), who recently gave me a reading, told me this year I would ‘come into my own.’ And that last year was about clearing away so I could start over on a blank canvas. That’s for damn sure. Time to break out the paints...
(marker & gouache)
(left-marker, right -marker & photoshop)


  1. Here's to your 2011 being soy free!

  2. Glad you are back. Takes time to recover from all those hard blows... changes of outlook and changes in life. If I lived closer I'd take you out for a glass of wine. Good to hear from you again and yes. Here's to 2011! Love and peace to you... Shan

  3. I missed you. A highlight of 2010 was getting to finally meet you in person. I hope 2011 is extra good to you. You deserve it! Coming into your own is a wonderful thing for a year to promise. Hooray you!xoxo

  4. It's so good to see you back, Cheryl...
    I truly missed reading you... 2010 sucked... It truly did...
    I hope this one brings you nothing but happiness and good things...

    (I am a big fan of your illustrations... You are amazingly talented!!)

    Love, XXX

  5. Hi Shannon, that would be so nice! I think hanging out with you would shake me any remaining gloomyness for sure! Love and peace to you too, xoxo

    Hi Tracey, It was pretty awesome meeting you too!! Thanks :) me too... xoxo

    Thanks Lena :D My astrologer friend, btw, said it sucked for just about everyone because of a major planetary shift. Hope this year brings you nothing but happiness and good things too, which it already is with your mysterious dream job...And I missed you and everyone here, too!! xoxo

  6. Yes, really nice to see you back (I'm late) with the right spirit for 2011! (I especially like the lady in black!) :-)


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