Cookies, Christmas cheer, and a new painting

I have been really emotional lately. It's not PMS. Well, it might be. That, and my fatiguing seasonal part time gig, the holidays and an upcoming b-day. Yesterday I was running on the beach and the beauty of the morning, the way the storm clouds darkened everything but a bright ribbon of light on the nearly still ocean water in the far distance, yada, yada, brought tears to my eyes. This morning, once again provoked to tears by the beauty of nature in the morning light, I ran through a big and tangled inventory of feelings. 1. I am really, really happy to still be alive. But 2. a little scared I will have another bout of heart trouble even though I 3. doubt I will have another one since my heart seems to be recovering nicely. 4. Sad that my dream job is still eluding me. 5. Hopeful and optimistic that it's just around the corner. 6. Frustrated to still be living in the apartment I thought would only be temporary and that I haven't had a boyfriend in like ages and ages. Damn, why did I turn that threesome opportunity down? Why? 7. Annoyed that L. has been depressed and therefor not much fun for the past several months. 8. Guilty that I am annoyed with L. for being depressed. 9. Grateful and 10. amused that after many months of searching for work I finally land a (seasonal) job as a Nestle Tollhouse cookie baker. Six to eight hours, three days a week baking three hundred and sixty cookies per hour. And I am supposed to say, but just can't, I really can't, say, Nestle baked some love for you today. Fuck they did. Well, is holiday money. And I do love the smell of fresh baked cookies. 11. Lazy. I love sleeping in, not having to get anywhere by a certain minute and a day stretching before me to fill any way I want. There's nothing like a part time non-dream job to make me 12. appreciate my time. Today, after my run, I checked my email, worked on my next illustration, had a late night hot chocolate with L. and wrote this blog post. 13. Disappointed not to be spending five weeks in Paris but am 14. looking forward to a week in New York City instead. Who cares if it'll be freezing cold there, I love New York! Lastly, I feel 15. eager to experience more of life, whatever happens, even if it means more birthdays.

Some photos from some of my lazy days off...
the Christmas display at the Hyatt, SF.


Thompson Street, Alameda, where every house looks like this for the holidays...

Kelly Reemston's art reception...
then drinks at The Pied Piper Bar, The Palace Hotel, SF...
A busker playing in the Powell Street Bart station...
some jewelry store displays, Union Square, SF...
I love the delicate details of these puppets.

My latest illustration, which took me longer to complete (because of the part time gig) than anticipated. I'm putting together a book of short stories, each one I hope to illustrate in a different style. This one, obviously, is about a girl who can fly...